Update

Dave (my ex) just texted me.  That in itself is a huge relief - he still has his mind.  He said they mixed up the doses on a couple of meds and his oxygen level dropped to 27%.  Had they not done room checks he would have been a goner.  His balance, coordination, vision, and speech are fucked up, but his mind seems intact.

*whew*

I really hate this shit, this swinging pendulum of emotions.  I'm amazed at how quickly anger can turn into panic and fear.  In an instant you realize that in spite of the anger, you don't want that person to suffer.  You don't want him to hurt, even though much of the hurt is happening because of his own poor choices.  You just want him to be ok.

I'm sure he'll sober up for a while and quite possibly relapse, however many times.  My anger will return, then something will make that pendulum wreak havoc, and the cycle will continue its destructive path through all of our lives.

Maybe one day a miracle will happen and he will be cured and we will all be able to move on with healthy and happy lives.

Not holding my breath, but it would sure be nice.