"I never apologize. I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am."
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
For Christmas this year I would like a cape, long and flowing and made of satin. I also want to sport a fancy spandex outfit to match the cape, with tennies to make me run faster and jump higher. My favorite color is purple please. I want the awesome cape and spandex outfit 'cause I think I'm a superhero and I might as well look like one. Can you please put this on my suit?
Ok, so here is what I need my superhero suit to be able to do:
Clean my apartment in the blink of an eye.
Have the means to support me and the kids with all the money in the world, 'cause now I get to pay for insurance for all of us. All four of us.
Make two of me so that I can go on field trips with the kids while working at the same time.
Make three of me so that I can be running errands while being on field trips and working all at the same time.
How about one more, one of us needs to get a good night's sleep.
It needs to teach me how to cook.
It needs to make lunches and a good breakfast every morning.
It needs to replace the window of my car that got broken into. I could use a new windshield too, all the cracks are pretty hard to see through.
It needs to protect my little boy who is still having trouble sleeping at night.
It needs to fit under my uniform so that I can wear it to work - please put something in there for when my back hurts so much.
It would help if it could do laundry, especially in an instant when my girl decides she NEEDS a specific item of clothing, regardless of how many other clean ones are already hanging in the closet.
It needs to teleport me to work because my car is on its last leg and gas costs me too much.
I need my suit to keep me calm with the kids, especially when they bicker. And I could use some help finding energy to play more with them.
I would like my suit to make me look like a million bucks because for some reason, I grew up hating everything about myself.
I need it to finalize my divorce and get me even a tiny bit of child support.
I need it to keep my ex on the straight and narrow - he teeters a lot and the kids need him more than ever.
My suit needs to be super absorbent for when I cry so much my left nostril won't stop producing boogies.
I need it to be made out of super strong material so that when I fall down really hard I can get back up and keep going.
Most of all I need for it to give me peace inside, to appreciate all the people in my life who show me love and support like I've never seen it before.