This morning Amanda became very flustered when she couldn't get her hair to do what she wanted, and that set her off on a frustrated tirade. Then she couldn't find her sweater...I didn't duck fast enough and was struck by a verbal blow or two, Amanda style. She stormed out the door, down the stairs, and over to the car and berated her little brother for looking at her. Poor guy was probably picking his nose minding his own business, undeserving of such treatment.
In the car on the way to school she vehemently folded her arms and turned to face the door, not looking back even once. Usually when she's upset she eventually relaxes and gets over it. Not today.
We have a bit of a walk from the car to the front entrance of the school, and for the first time all year she didn't hold my hand or talk to me for that matter, and there was a bit of distance between us. We got inside and gave hugs and kisses and touched our fingers together for our non-verbal "I love you's", and she walked away without saying a word.
I lingered for just a moment, watching as she withdrew into the noisy hallway. I felt an empty pang for the connection that was not made with her before we parted ways. I know this won't last forever, and that when I pick her up this afternoon all will be back to normal. I'm sure this is a sign of things to come when she hits those dreaded teenage years. I will be hated for no reason, blamed for every reason, and snubbed on a regular basis. I'm just not ready for that yet...and never will be.