I went a week in Denver without internet, *using* only once one morning at a nearby Starbucks while Josh was at work so I could check in with the blog. Ok I did use once more but it was a quickie in the parking lot of a McDonald's and I swear it was only to email some pictures of a dog to someone. Wham bam thank you ma'am, in and out, quick as a flash.
Then when I finished I nearly vomited from the dizzying apparitions of my email inbox folders appearing out of nowhere, the lost images of the World Wide Web dissolving into my scattered internet-withdrawaled brain.
Scary shit I tell you.
As soon as we arrived back home the first thing I did was pull out my computer, ready to sink into the couch and get myself buzzed off wireless vibes.
Laptop on lap...kids sucked into the TV...Mama was ready...
What the fuck.
Error messages, dropped connections, unable to connect. Over and over and over again.
I "WHAT THE FUCKED" for about two days...
Tonight I was finally able to log on, and where I expected the rush of internet adrenaline, all I felt was
I was off the grid for a few days and Mother Earth never fell off her axis; Superman didn't need to fly around the earth counter-clockwise to fix the horrific damage of my non-existence; no one even really gave a shit I was gone.
Doesn't my life depend on how connected I am to the words and images I see on my screen every day? Won't I go into anaphylactic shock if I don't connect to whomever the fuck is out there happening to connect with me at the same time?
I guess not.
So now, instead of starting each day with my regular doses of facebook, People online, and Yahoo, I'm going to break out the yoga mat, stretch like the lynx I am not, drink hot tea and meditate, and feel eternally grateful for the abundance I have in my life.
Yeah, fuck that shit.
I'm totally gonna log on and get my internet buzz on, bitches.
Every fuckin day.